Oh Captain, My Captain

Throughout my limited corporate flying experience I have noticed that captains come in all shapes and sizes. I imagine that they think the same thing of first officers. I have come to appreciate the need for SOP's because of this experience. It is difficult sometimes when you fly with different captains from day to day because they each want things done a certain way. Sometimes they contradict each other. I want to do a good job but as a whole it gets confusing. It seems as though the FAA does get somethings right...
I find myself also thinking about the added safety factor with SOP's there is rarely a question about how things should be done because if there is an argument or disagreement you look in the manual. There are some captains I love flying with though just due to personality and their ability to communicate effectively. Also, their general willingness to follow the rules.

The hazardous attitude I am most susceptible to is resignation. It seems that this comes up frequently, where a captain does something they shouldn't and I have to call them on it in a respectful way. This in itself is difficult, how do you stand your ground without undermining their authority?